Back in the Groove

Wendy Liebman: It's a family, the Cavanaugh's - Ann and William. They're eating dinner, and they just finish, and their maid comes in and she clears the plates. And they have two children, Betsy and Timmy. And Ann suggests that they all go into the drawing room, where Ann then braids Betsy's beautiful blonde hair. The husband, he plays chess with Timmy - and then the maid comes in with strawberries and whipped cream, and they all eat a nice dessert. And that's the act.
Penn Jillette: What do you call an act like that?
Wendy Liebman: The Cocksucking Motherfuckers

- The Aristocrats

Patrick Lenard's courses for Fall 2007 semester at The University of North Texas:


Film Style Production 8-8:50am Mondays and Wednesdays --
The lecture is taught by a petite Lebanese woman in her late 20's whose style of teaching reflects that of an elementary school teacher and asks obvious questions such as, "What three parts make up a film?Beginning, middle, and end!" The lab, which I'm dreading, is taught by a questionable man who resembles a serial-killer with a smarmy haircut and whom I'm sure stares at me throughout the lecture, conspiring how exactly to kill me. I have to make five films throughout the semester. Thankfully my friend Roy is in this class and shares with me the same wariness I hold toward the lab instructor.

Film History Pre-1945 9:30-11:20am every Tuesday --
I'm pleased to see the same professor who taught post-1945 History is teaching this class. I'm not pleased to find out that most of the class content is online, meaning that I am only able to woo over her romantic British accent once a week.

Spanish 4 12:30-1:50pm Tuesdays and Thursdays --
Taught by a softspoken, mousy blonde woman who I like immediately because of her disarming character. I recognize faces from previous semesters of Spanish. We are assigned to clusters of five yesterday to participate in group activity. I am unusually outspoken and the guy next to me laughs at everything I say which makes me feel egotistical. I like this class.

Gender and Sexuality in the Horror Film 5:00-9:20pm every Tuesday --
I signed up for this class only to be in the presence of the greatest professor in the known world. He's a 40-something gay doctor and published author of multiple books; one of which called "Monters in the closet: Homosexuality and the Horror Film". Yeah. Who doesn't want to take a class where 100 people have heavy, in depth discussions about phallic symbols, American counterculture, and sex? Some of the topics we're studying this semster include: Queer Theory of Horror, Drive-in Horror, Leftist Horror Auteurs, The Slasher Film, and Torture Porn. Hooray!

History of the Documentary 3:00-6:50pm every Wednesday --
Overwhelming desires to stab a pen in my eyeball or commit suicide are the enticing side effects of this professor's style of teaching. He is the teacher from Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Thankfully I have a friend in the class to diminish my pain. He has a filthy mouth and makes crude comments under his breath after every statement from the teacher. I took a class with him a couple semesters ago and I remember literally crying from laughing so hard.

Here are photos from the past week or so:

Moses plays inside my egg crate foam pad.


He also models.



Chacho's. Where middle aged drunk women make fools of themselves on the karaoke stage.



After two margaritas at Mi Cocina in Plano, TX.


Took a trip north to move into my new apartment. This is my building.


Where do we start?


The final product





Surprise! You have a half-wall and no door to your bedroom! Oh well.




While we were in town, Laura and Kevin took us to a wine bar.




Laters for now!